A fine balance

This is a topic I think about A LOT at NaturePlay sessions and it’s something I talk about with parents all the time too.

When do you step in and physically help your child to climb on or jump off things? And when do you step back and let them learn to balance by themselves?

The answer is not so simple! It’s really all a fine balance that each parent/carer needs to navigate with their own child/ren. Taking children outdoors, going on hikes, playing in natural environments can bring ample opportunity for kids to climb, to jump and to take physical risks.

Here are a few ideas to support you in creating opportunities for your kids to get outside and take some risks;

Will my input benefit my child’s development?

Growing up is inherently risky. Have you spent time with a child as they learn to walk? There are all sorts of challenges and each child navigates them in their own way. Some take 10 months to get there, others 18 months. Some pull themselves up using furniture, some rely heavily on an adult and others just stand up and then start stepping. There’s no absolute right way, so follow your child and seek support if you notice anything that bothers you or you need to clarify with other parents, medical professionals or those with professional knowledge of early childhood learning and development.

Next time you are about to step in to “help” your child, check in with yourself about whether they will benefit from your help.

Take some risks yourself, balance on a log, jump off a rock.

Can they do it themselves?

Children need lots and lots and lots of opportunities to learn things for themselves. Physical development comes when children DO for themselves. I always think about what is happening in a child’s brain when an adult responds. If a child is given the opportunity to balance on a log and they only have themselves to rely upon, they will intuitively bend their knees a little more or put their arms out. Some children do this with ease and with confidence. Others are more naturally cautious. Follow your child’s lead.

You could use encouraging words instead of stepping in physically. (this is also a balance! Sometimes it’s nice to speak your child through their experiences, but sometimes it’s nice to just allow your child to become captivated by their play, without your words interrupting them!)

What about those kids who are more adventurous?

This can be tricky! If, as a parent, you are free and easy about not stepping in to assist, your child may climb to heights that they simply cannot manage themselves! Some will jump off anyway and many will be fine.

It’s up to you then to decide whether your feeling of discomfort is because your own ideas of child development are being stretched, or whether your child is actually at risk and needs you to step in!

Parenting is a tricky business. What works for one child may not work for another. What works for one family may not be suitable for your own. There are just so many variables and influences.

Trust yourself and trust your child. Give them plenty of space to navigate these physical challenges early, and at their own pace. Be brave! Step back when your child is small and the risk is small and give them plenty of chances to navigate risk for themselves as they grow.

Give them time to stand tall, boost their confidence and challenge themselves.

Give them a chance to find joy in being physical and playing freely.

Give them the chance to build muscle strength and increase their balance.

Remember to have a balance on a log or a block too, it’s also fun for adults!